Home Forums Loneliness Finding lockdown really hard this time

Allexie Posted 2 years ago
Finding lockdown really hard this time

Was so much easier in spring and summer. The bad weather and dark nights are not helping this time round!

10 likes & 30 replies
    • GreginYorkshire 11th November 2020 at 5:05 pm

      I help to run a mental health charity and we support a lot of people who have a problem with anxiety under normal conditions, and most are struggling now more than ever. Keep an eye open for positive news. This vaccine looks really promising, and there is light at the end of the tunnel at long last. If you need to chat, message me.

    • Inky Ess 11th November 2020 at 5:51 pm

      Hi Allexie

      i know what you mean, the first time round the weather helped buoy us all along.  I always find this time of year difficult but the lockdown has really impacted on my mental health.  However, after hearing the news about a possible breakthrough with the vaccine I am hopeful that this will soon be over.  What try to do is get outside for a walk every day, no matter what the weather. It really does help to get some fresh air, being indoors drives me str crazy!  Stay positive and if you need to chat just message me.  (On the bottom of this post there’s an envelope icon, click on it and hey presto! Message can be sent).

      best wishes


      • Allexie 11th November 2020 at 10:54 pm

        Hi Shari and thank you so much for your very kind message.  It is good to have some glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel, (vaccine!!), but I fear it will be a long long time before things get back to anything like normal again.  In the meantime I guess we just keep on keeping on!!  I too try to get out for a walk every day, fortunately i have a park right across the road from me, otherwise I really would go loopy as I live in an apartment with no garden or even balcony for gulps of fresh air.

        Take care and stay safe,


        Allexie x

        • Inky Ess 12th November 2020 at 5:52 am

          Hi Allexie

          yes that’s what we do isn’t it? Keep on keeping on… taking one day at a time.

          take care of yourself and stay strong

          Shari x

    • Deleted User 12th November 2020 at 10:16 am

      HI everyone
      I totally empathise with you all , I too am finding it really hard. I’m 63, live on my own and my son (only child) lives in Australia. I should’ve been there right now and it is really getting me down. Speaking to him via a laptop screen just doesn’t compare to being there with him. I dearly want to put my arms around him and hug him tight. I miss him so much and hope to move there permanently. Should’ve been on my way this time next year but the Aus govt upped the age limit for the visa I need by 2 yrs which means my 12mth wait is now 3 years. Heartbreaking 🙁
      I hate the long dark winter months at the best of times but currently I am hating it and have days when i feel that I’m not living, just ‘existing’
      I have no family close by and just one friend who lives locally. Most of my friends don’t live locally and are spread out in the UK. I only have a handful of family here, I have more family in Australia than the UK.
      I am so used to just getting out and about, meeting friends for lunch, coffee, theatre, cinema, walks with my Ramblers groups etc and had been doing a lot of activities on my own but now can’t even do most of them. I love to travel so have missed the trips I had planned for this year and cannot wait to get on a plane again.  I feel like my wings have been well and truly clipped. Luckily I have a part time job, 2 mornings a week and that is keeping me sane!!! I also live a few mins walk from the Bridgewater Canal so I get out for a walk as often as I can. Helps clear my head.
      I had major life changing surgery in January this year so feel like I’ve been ‘locked down’ since then. I had just been given the ok to drive and get out more when 5 days later we got put into ‘lockdown 1’.

      I for one will be glad to see the back of 2020 and hope 2021 brings us better days.

    • Sarah1234 12th November 2020 at 2:30 pm

      Hi All,

      I’m new to this group (only joined yesterday), and already I feel like there are like minded people out there.  I think the majority of people are struggling this time round during lockdown, the dark evenings and miserable days can be difficult to contend with, it seems oh so long ago that we could all come and go and do whatever we wanted and when we wanted – I’m hoping that eventually we will return to those days again in the future.  Its definitely positive news that there is a possible vaccine out there, and don’t we all need some of that positivity.

      I’m 60, married to a wonderful man, I’ve recently been made redundant after being in my last job for 17 years – it was a job I really loved and the people were so friendly and nice (just like my extended family), but now I find myself wondering what on earth I am going to do today because I have never been out of work, so what what with lockdown and now no job, its tough.

      I know I will pick myself up off the ground and dust myself off but we need to all remember we are all in this together, and we will get through this but we can all support each other and try and lift our spirits.

      Here’s hoping to fabulous news the vaccine works and we get back to some sort of normal life again.


      Sarah xx

    • jonathan.jordan2112 12th November 2020 at 9:53 pm

      It’s really tough. Had a couple of losses over a short period, and the world feels like it’s closing in.

      Seems a long time since I had any laughs or very much fun.

      Keeping very fit, reading lots, and trying to stay positive, but have to say , not easy.

      • Inky Ess 15th November 2020 at 9:40 am

        So sorry for your losses, lockdown makes it doubly hard to cope with anything as you can’t get the emotional support you need.  Not getting hugs is the hardest.  You are doing well, exercise is good and although it’s hard to stay positive all the time we do try.  This too will pass.  Stay strong and take care (((hugs)))

        best wishes


    • JJay18 12th November 2020 at 11:37 pm

      Really finding it hard too. During the first lockdown I found out my husband was having an affair so swelling as working from home I had to deal with him going off to meet her. As soon as restrictions lifted enough I left as I couldn’t stay with all the memories. Have spent most of the time working from home so not seen people and not able to socialise. Finding it so hard as he has her and her son and I have no idea when I will get the opportunity to go out  again. My girls are older and have their own relationships so find myself alone much of the time as even when they are home they are in their rooms. Just feel like I am going to be stuck like this forever

      • hazeljanejohnson 13th November 2020 at 6:08 am

        I know how difficult it is especially when family times aren’t good. My husband is a controller and emotionally abusive and my eldest son is very similar. I have had a major operation and neither have been supportive. To be honest it was the last straw as I have decided that after Xmas I will leave. Daunting really as I am 65 but with the virus the family the op I just feel I now need me time to recover and become the free spirit I always was. The lockdown is bad enough for everyone but add that to other problems then it becomes unbearable. Keep your chin up

        • JJay18 13th November 2020 at 8:37 am

          Wishing you all the best for the future. I hope you manage to recuperate well It’s not an easy decision to make. I hadn’t realised how controlling my husband was until I started talking to a relate counsellor. It seems that looking back I gave up everything I was to be his wife. Now I don’t have that I have very few friends most are work colleagues and no way of building on those relationships now covid has us locked down again.

      • Dave C 13th November 2020 at 8:06 am

        I sympathize and empathize. I separated from my wife of 50 years several weeks ago, was lucky to have been re-housed by the council until the family house is sold. The feelings I am experiencing are possibly similar to yours, almost like a bereavement.

        This damn lockdown is causing massive anxiety, living in a new village, nobody I know nearby, it really is tough. You do have your children, talk to them, they will understand and I am sure will offer good advice.

        You must try and stay strong, what has happened is now history, your future is tomorrow, grasp it.

        • JJay18 13th November 2020 at 8:31 am
          • Thanks Dave C. You’re right it is a lot like bereavement. It’s just worse as I know he chose to carry on with her rather than work on our marriage. COVID is making it so much harder to start the process of moving on. I do speak to the girls but they are both in good happy relationships and I don’t want my sadness bringing the down or stop them trying to rebuild their relationship with him as they are feeling replaced too as they have lost their childhood home. I know it takes time and I am still finding myself as I got lost somewhere along the way. Just feel so isolated through this lockdown
        • Dave C 13th November 2020 at 8:55 am

          XXX sending you a virtual hug

        • TmonT 15th November 2020 at 11:22 pm

          His loss an always remember that

    • Christopher Leslie 15th November 2020 at 12:34 am

      I agree this second  lockdown is worse than the first. Possibly because I had to shield which has meant no visitors or visits in a new location so no local friends. Then just when it seemed safer to venture out another lockdown. This time With no more jobs to do around my home. Still could be worse at least I’ve avoided getting covid

    • pink.campion 19th November 2020 at 12:10 pm

      Yes much harder now but I walk everywhere.. it’s purposeful, therapeutic and healthy.. just have to wrap up. Then I use the 7 min app to do strength and balance exercises and yoga with Adrienne free on YouTube … feel so much better!

      big light on horizon too with vaccines. Try and look ahead

      • scremer51 27th November 2020 at 6:44 pm

        Yes I agree. I have toned my thighs with all the walking ! Got some bad ass walking boots and wet weather gear so I don’t stop during the winter. I look after my elderly mum and my morning walks have kept me sane. Put in your earbuds, listen and walk to to a funky beat …. you will feel more positive. It’s really helped me …. I swear!
        Good luck everyone x

    • Allexie 19th November 2020 at 1:12 pm

      How do people feel about the possibility of another months lockdown in exchange for 5 days of freedom at Christmas??  Would it be worth it to you?

      • Dave C 20th November 2020 at 9:23 am

        I now live on my own (very recently separated), have always enjoyed family Christmas times, however, this year I think it would be sensible to keep safe and not all get together. I cannot cope with the prospect of another lockdown as a result.

      • Cal412 26th November 2020 at 7:47 pm

        I think they should leave all as it is. I wont be visiting anyone but my grandkids to give their pressies then I’m back home. Not worth it I dont think.

      • Christopher Leslie 28th November 2020 at 2:30 pm

        Makes no difference to me as I’ve been in shielding since March and for shielder the advice has never changed. But I do think a 5 day respite is beneficial for those who can take advantage of it. Yes it will probably mean a spike afterwards because there are many out there who cannot think and reason so will go for the big gatherings with no precautions then blame the authorities for not stopping them. By the way church services how do they work now? Communion involves drinking from a chalice and the placing of a wafer on the tounge, singing reciting etc. I’m not criticising I genuinely want to know.

    • Beverley 26th November 2020 at 12:59 am

      Hello Everyone
      I have been reading all your chats/ feeds.
      I feel for you all and know exactly where you are all coming from.
      We are all experiencing Covid in different ways.
      I feel that it hits people harder when they are on their own especially in Lockdown where we are very limited socially ..
      With no Gyms, Cafes, resturants open.
      What definetly doesnt help people is these stupid Rules that the goverment are implementing that are not making any Logic sense only causing anxiety, fustration anger and confusion.
      What has all this lockdown been for if the goverment is now allowing 3 families to Mix indoors. What about large families who have maybe 5 or 7 family members in one family??
      That means then, that Family groups of at least 15 people indoors with Alcohol is acceptable??
      Who actually comes up with these ridicalous rules to only cause more fustration and anger to people like myself who are obeying / respecting lock down rules in the hope that it lessons cases and end lockdown.
      UK goverment is a laughing stock and i have no faith in these polititions who run this country, in fact its embarrasing and the Goverment actions are causing more harm than good (as usual) why cant they learn off other countries.
      They couldnt give a Monkeys flying shit :0 about, conservation, recycling, wildlife, welfare, jobs, peoples livelihoods, all they care about is lining their own pockets and how their job helps them to do it quicker by having the right connnections at their fingertips!
      Its no wonder more people are wanting to get out of the UK.
      It is a lovely country with beautiful landscapes but run by a muppet show who could not give a dam about what the British people want
      Sorry its a negative post BTW just getting rid of my fustration x x

    • TmonT 26th November 2020 at 2:25 pm

      I agree I’m more worried this time
      I did not know anyone who contacted Covid This time I am hearing if more we an more people ❤️

    • Christopher Leslie 28th November 2020 at 2:36 pm

      Dark nights Dont help but also this has been ongoing for 10 months with no clue of when it will end. Seeing no one for a while is OK but this protracted isolation can really screw you up. I’m slowly losing the art of conversation communication being sending messages rather than talking

    • Gates 2nd December 2020 at 11:38 pm

      I am the same, very tough.