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  • Dating when you’re over 50

    Single for 10 yrs, I’m n old hand on dating sites. But I wondered if anyone else finds them a challenge?

    Posted by bee.bryce
Viewing 35 reply threads
    • Reply by sheila.oconnor

      Anyone in Glasgow? I find dating online a wonderful way to meet people.

    • Reply by hollybushcamping2014

      Hi. I am Barbara and I am living in Eastleigh,  Hampshire. Anyone down this way? I  like to go wild swimming and canoeing, dancing, walking, exploring,  camping, horse riding,  …I love gardening,  scrabble, table tennis, crafts, design,…I am a spiritual life coach and psychic.

      My partner died 7 years ago. I have had a bit of a go at dating sites last year but it was miserable.

      I am glad to be here . Thanks for having me.

    • Reply by julier2768

      It was very interesting to read all the messages here. I’ve been living and working abroad for 10 years now and decided to come back to the UK at one of the strangest times ever. I’m in Lancashire to be closer to my parents. This is a whole new area for me, originally from Glasgow. Getting out and meeting people is a must but it is a bit tricky in a new area. Online dating is a complete minefield. I gave it a try as two friends had great success. Hhhmmmm…… for me not so good. A lot of very strange people out there. You really do have to be in a very positive state of mind to tackle these dating sites. Hoping to connect with people for friendship via this forum.

      • Reply by Caroline

        Haha I have given it a go and OMG some ppl out there 🤢

        It lasted a week and then I dumped it 😂

    • Reply by muriel_mg

      Hi, I think in one of my previous messages I mentioned that I had tried a dating site for a very brief time but I just wanted to warn ladies here to double check on a man who they are interested in, I know this is common sense but now I am talking from another point of view. My ex had a mid life crisis at 59. He went on dating sites such as match.com and POF. Despite what these sites say about monitoring who registers with them he claimed he was single, or separated or living with a disabled wife. We were married and living “happily” together with what I thought was a normal relationship. He only met with the women during the day time while I was out at work. He had to cancel “dates” at short notice if my work was cancelled. The excuse once he got to know them was that my “carer” hadn’t turned up! So basically if you meet someone who does this watch out, also if they only want to meet up in the area where you live and not in his area which is also what he did.

      So this is just a warning or tip. Could also go the same way for men out there trying to date.

       

      • Reply by sheila.oconnor

        OMG how did you find out all that?

        • Reply by muriel_mg

          He went out one day and text me in the evening to say he wouldn’t be home as he had too much to drink. I got suspicious because despite his faults that wasn’t like him. I went out into the garage where he had been spending a lot of time and found a secret laptop, opened it up and his emails were open. Did a web search and found the dating sites open. Lots of pathetic emails to women and lovey dovey ones. My son came out to find me and took over and opened a can of worms including a pre-pay credit card, receipts for expensive treatments/make up for one woman. I looked in some drawers and found a calendar he had printed out with my working days on it! I was supposed to be working the next day but I phoned in sick and waited up for him to come home. He came home after he thought I would be at work. His face was a picture when he saw me! The garage was then locked every time he went out and the keys hidden! He went away for a few days and I found the keys and made copies of them! Told me he had met the love of his life, she was nine years older than him, ten years older than me! They are now cooking nicely in Spain and he is living with a disabled woman! He forgot he had an internet savvie wife and a son even more so!

      • Reply by kateyone

        Spot on ….. Yes I know of this being done. Fortunately not to me but some other poor person.  The people that tell lies are very very good at it.

        • Reply by juliechome2

          Yes some of these people seem very genuine and thoughtful but they are anything but. I havnt had that experience but friends have and it has been awful for them.

    • Reply by sheila.oconnor

      Anyone in Glasgow. Im a young 60 year old. Have lived in USA and am now back in my native Glasgow. Always happy to meet new friends.

      • Reply by marina

        Glasgow


        Maybe start a group on here ?

        • Reply by sheila.oconnor

          Dont know how to start a group but would love to. Im at [email protected]

        • Reply by sheila.oconnor

          Hi Marina are you in Glasgow? Want to meet fof a coffee? Im west end but could meet in town. [email protected]

    • Reply by barbara.sketchley59

      Widowed young (53) relationship 20 years since but now alone again. Still don’t feel ready to be alone but feeling rather battered by life. I’m not ready to stop hoping for love.

      • Reply by elfsue1959

        It gets easier, Celebrate your wonderfulness. You got this XX

        • Reply by barbara.sketchley59

          Thank you. When I was 53 and widowed the future looked sad but hopeful, I had my life my husband had lost his. Along comes a man and for twenty years we’ve had a weird relationship. That’s over and at almost 75 I’m sad again but no longer hopeful. I’m not ready to be an old lady.

        • Reply by elfsue1959

          You can be who you like lovely. I think some older people have a twinkle in their eyes still, which is nice to see and also attractive, Betty White is lovely for example well into her 80’s too. Its not to late hun xx

    • Reply by Gilly HEmerson

      Hi I’m in Cornwall. I moved here quite recently and am single. Is there anyone on  this site from here. Someone to meet up with for coffee and social stuff.  I’ve moved from Manchester love Cornwall but as I moved just before lock down have had no chance to join groups and build up a group of friends.
      I’m in my 50,s and don’t want to do the dating site thing. Is there anyone nearby ?? 🤞

      • Reply by juliechome2

        I have found the Meet Up groups a great way to meet people. Found people are friendly, from all walks of life, all ages and backgrounds. Been on walks, meals, to gigs and other trips with various Meet Up groups. Have a look online for Meet Up groups in your area you might find one you like (they are free to join so this is not a marketing thing).

      • Reply by marina

        Check out local groups In Community Forum and start a conversation on there maybe if people check it out you can get a Rest Less group together ?

    • Reply by marina

      Hi everyone, I too am single and wary of dating sites. Rest Less have just started ‘ local groups’ function for cities across the UK. I think that would be a great place to start by messaging on there and getting a group together maybe. Already on this thread there are lots of lovely ladies and gentlemen that are looking for companionship,  friends and even relationships. Worth a try everyone….. also, I would also recommend U3a for group activities they exist all over as well. Meetup is also handy I joined an over 50s group but not been to many events but they have frequent get togethers. It’s not for dating but as everyone here knows, when you feel good in yourself and stay active that’s when you glow and hopefully through shared interests . I also think Having interests such as those that enjoy Golf is also a lovely thing to do. Sitting at home will not bring all these moments to you.

      who knows what life will bring, getting out there is a good step and have a look on local groups here, if nobody uses them they won’t work !

    • Reply by minpen21

      I struggled with the idea of dating even when I was younger. Newly 50, my ideas around dating are traditional. As in I like to get to know someone  without this 24/7 culture we have today. Personally I don’t like the idea of ‘ paying ‘ to find a date,  but equally people are wary of a random stranger asking for your phone number.

      • Reply by jean.smith.sheffield

        Know the feeling. Never been on a dating site.  Is this the way its done these days?

         

        • Reply by minpen21

          It seems to be. Unless you are still a party animal and like to go out a lot. I hold onto the hope that I meet someone through a non dating site.

        • Reply by jean.smith.sheffield

          Here here totally agree.  Rather have a nice meal and a good bottle of wine these days. Good company is also a bonus of course. Lol.

        • Reply by minpen21

          Totally agree with you on that 😄

        • Reply by jean.smith.sheffield

          Great minds think alike.

        • Reply by kateyone

          Look out for a group called  Meetup.  We have a few here in Somerset.  I have made lots of friends male and female. We go out on all sort of activities, meals. evenings out. weekends away.  Or if you have time on your hands go on one of the Meetup ( its in red writing) and you can see a link to start up a group yourself in your area.  I pay £10 per year and if I attend an event i.e  a show or a meal or visit to a trust then we all pay our own way.

        • Reply by jean.smith.sheffield

          Thank you Katey. I will look out for that group in Yorkshire/ Derbyshire. Its sound really good.

        • Reply by kateyone

          https://www.meetup.com

          The meetup sign is in red and all letters joined up  ( I sound like a child saying joined up writing hahah)

    • Reply by sami2003

      Hi, I am 63 years old genuine who lives in London’s superb area, Primrose Hill, would like to meet up with a genuine lady who lives nearby to share some interests e.g. going out, jogging, swimming and have intelligent chat.

      Sami

      [email protected]

    • Reply by fonteszaida

      I m wandering if this dating site will work and I will make friends or organise a group of people with good intentions to build friendship and companionship.
      I m living in littlehampton and I am 54 years old. I am single and I love to have deep conversations, read, movies and outdoors fun. I love to go out for a good meal and I am longing for a genuine connection with someone .

      • Reply by sami2003

        I wish you were closer to London.

    • Reply by Anonymous User

      I’m 54 now. I lost my hubby just over 2 years ago. We had a wonderful relationship and he was truly my best friend. During his treatment, he had cancer, he always said he wanted me to meet someone else and have fun. My daughters both encourage me to meet someone but I find I’m becoming scared to venture too far. I’ve tried dating sites but they scared me and I unsubscribed after a few hours. I’m normally so outgoing and can’t wait to get back to playing golf and getting out. I’ve decided to give myself a good talking to. Life’s too short to sit at home and rot.

      • Reply by fionj48

        Hi, I’d forget dating sites and stick to golf! Are you a member of a club? I took the sport up seven years ago and have never looked back! It’s great for meeting and socialising, keeping you fit and mentally alert and totally addictive! Fiona x

      • Reply by Anonymous User

        Thank you. Would have loved a game of golf or even joined you to walk the dogs. Thanks for your message 👍🏻😁

        • Reply by fionj48

          Sorry I don’t know your name. I’m sure you were a great support to your husband and are feeling very scared now about the future. Just take each day as it comes. Try and do something for yourself that makes you happy. Do you have friends at your golf club? Fresh air and exercise will boost you too. Just be comfortable with your decisions and things will slowly get better. Fiona x

      • Reply by gerry.beaton

        You are quite right – life is for living! If I lived nearer I’d meet you for a game of golf and I’d persuade you to get back on to the dating site!! Good luck with everything, don’t worry you are not alone……

        • Reply by fionj48

          I met my partner nine years ago at a dancing class. It’s a great way to make friends and keep fit too 😀 I really do think the dating sites were a waste of time. Far better to have a common interest, make new friends and if something meant to be it will be!

    • Reply by k.wilson07

      I’ve been divorced for 14 years, had a 2 year relationship that ended 3 years ago, since then I’ve tried internet dating…… wow what a mine field, I’m a sociable person who has found myself without friends and very lonely….. how does everyone else cope …???

      • Reply by wendyst13

        It is @ minefield and sometimes not very pleasant but you have to meet people some way

      • Reply by sherriffsmum

        I belong to a group called Just Friends. Perhaps there’s one where you live. It opens up endless opportunities for you. It’s not a dating group either.

        • Reply by k.wilson07

          Thank you I will check, I have tried goggling groups to join but none local……x

        • Reply by sherriffsmum

          There is a National group called U 3 A. They have groups all over UK.

    • Reply by fonteszaida

      Hi there

      My purpose is that I would like to get to know people And we never know …….

      I am looking for friendship and company to go out  and enjoy a good conversation a movie a meal ……

      simple and genuine

      • Reply by jean.smith.sheffield
        1. Same here but its hard knowing where to start dont you agree?
        • Reply by fonteszaida

          I understand…… but also we need to start somewhere…… with trust and compassion for ourselves

        • Reply by jean.smith.sheffield

          I agree totally… and I think you know when the time is right.

        • Reply by fonteszaida

          May I ask you where you are from .

        • Reply by jean.smith.sheffield

          Sheffield in the UK. I’ve  put UK because I believe Restless is a worldwide site, and yourself?

    • Reply by sherriffsmum

      I’ve not been on a dating site for years but feel it’s time to see if there are any genuine men out there over 55.

       

      • Reply by ianctaylor176

        I am a genuine guy looking for friends,I live just outside York

      • Reply by ianctaylor176

        I am genuine,I live in a York ,looking for friends

      • Reply by k.wilson07

        I’ve had a few years on and off dating sites with very little luck……. but I live in hope, it’s so difficult as you get older….?

        • Reply by jean.smith.sheffield

          Hi I live on the outskirts of Chesterfield and visit the Peak district regularly. Never been on a dating site but know what you mean about it getting harder as you get older. I’m 65 and would love to meet people of a similar age for outings and companionship.

Viewing 35 reply threads