Home Forums General 3 wishes…. so your clearing the garage and find...

Tambos57 Posted 4 months ago
3 wishes…. so your clearing the garage and find an old lamp, give it a rub and a geni pops out, gives you 3 wishes.

What would you wish for and why.

Share
8 likes & 116 replies
    • Reverend Nick 18th January 2022 at 12:14 pm

      Wishes proffered by genies invariably come with a twist or a trick when they are granted. So my wish for a night on the tiles with Anita Rani would end up being a trip to B&Q’s bathroom section, with her asking me which design of tile I preferred.

      As you all know: it is impossible for a bloke to give a coherent opinion on home furnishings. “Oh, whichever one you like . . .” always seems to get you into trouble!

      Reply
    • Linpap 18th January 2022 at 12:27 pm

      🤣🤣 not quite the same sort of tiles…

      Reply
    • Staying Alive 18th January 2022 at 1:45 pm

      O Geni geni where for art Thy geni . My lam is all polished 🤷🏽‍♀️

      Reply
    • Mad Ralph 18th January 2022 at 3:26 pm

      I was once stranded on a desert island with two friends, we’d been there about three weeks and were close to starvation. As we crawled along searching for food I found a lamp and gave it a rub. A genie popped out and granted us one wish each. My first friend, a family man, asked to be back home in the uk surrounded by his wife and children eating rib eye steak. POOF he was gone. My second friend, a young bachelor, asked to be in a 5 star all inclusive hotel in the Caribbean surrounded by beautiful single girls. POOF he was gone. Finally the the genie turned to me and asked what my wish would be. I was feeling a bit lonely by this point so I said “I just want my mates back” 😞

      Reply
    • Robert K 18th January 2022 at 3:50 pm

      Ignoring the obvious ones – world peace, cure for cancer, my team winning the FA Cup:

      Wishes –

      1. Ability to speak another language.

      2. Ability to play a musical instrument.

      3. I wish I were 1/2 inch taller (to make six feet).

      Reply
      • Tambos57 18th January 2022 at 4:13 pm

        Well I’m glad you said feet and not inches!

        Reply
      • Always 18th January 2022 at 4:43 pm

        I can lend you a pair of heels? They do wonders for your height!

        Reply
      • madeleine45 21st January 2022 at 11:10 am

        Hey Robert,
        You are so lucky. No need for a magic lantern, you might need just some high heel boots but ignore that one. You can actually achieve your other two yourself starting today. How exciting and positive. You can have a go for yourself, you do not have to measure up to anyone else, for the pleasure ( and yes the frustration for a while!) you can gain from learning any instrument you fancy. Go mad and buy a recorder. Not too expensive, light to carry and pack – so if the weather is nice you will still be sticking to covid rules by going off for a walk and if you find yourself somewhere away by yourself, on the moors, by a beck or whatever you can enjoy having a go. Did you know there are a lot of different types of recorders and once you have got started you can (after covid) get involved in a group if you like it.? Huge range of music you can try. I always had tin whistles and recorders stuck in a rucksac and stashed carefully in a bunk on the boat. Of course these days you can also look on utube for help too. Now I am a language teacher as you will have gathered and the main barrier you have over speaking another language is in your mind. So a) think what you want from it- obviously I love meeting and talking and am , Interested in the wide variety of people I might meet , so need to learn the language or I will miss out – If you enjoy eating out on holiday , the goal is to be able to understand the menu and look forward to trying out something special when you are away. Going to go sailing? It will be good to know the names of the directions and you surely do need to know the equivalent of lee Oh or you might get swiped by the boom coming over. Then just for a bit of naughtiness you could also find out and learn a good few swear words _ these you usually learn from live people not courses! – .Given the situation in this country at the moment it is great to have a few words in another language – in fact choose a slightly unusual one not french or german – and you can have a good mutter at the news. There is a lovely portuguese word that sounds rather like a sneeze and it is something like schoteeshu. It only means something like bother and is not a swear word (as far as I was told!) but if you say it quite loudly with the stress on the tee bit it sounds wonderfully expressive. A marvellous comment on the Boorish Boris, When you start learning whichever you choose to try you will find groups of people who you could do some learning with without it involving exams or anything like that. I used to get groups of 12 to 15 people and they would be in groups of 3. Didnt matter what their own language was , they would all be speaking english at whatever level. So I used to write little scenes on a piece of paper . Each group took a slip and went off to practise and then they came back into the circle to perform their scene. So I would ask them to cope with typical situations. Beginners would be two people sat at a table and the third was the waiter and they would order tea and toast. Another would be in a pub A slightly higher level group would have shop scenes , customer describing some clothes they need for an occasion and the other person being the shop keeper. The very advanced level used to have a lovely lesson as I would be able to show them the wonderful Ronnie Barker Four candles/Fork Handles . You could really see how good they were when they understood it enough to laugh at the jokes, but then getting them to explain to other pupils bits that they did not understand was quite frustrating for them, and they would be tempted to explain in their native language. I tried to discourage that but doesnt really matter. The best thing with that was that you could repeat the same piece about a month later. Of course they had seen it before and could get the guist of it , but they were always so pleased with how much they understood and of the nuances they now picked up. Dont let embarrasment or fear of being laughed at put you off . You will miss so much. dont forget you have hands and facial expressions, if the words dont work , you can point to things , pick things up, and gesture. I have picked out good things to eat in a little cafe near the souk in Istanbul, with no common language by the simple old thing of pointing at the plate, smiling at the diner and sticking my thumb up and just said Good in as many languages as I could remember. Anyway these days you dont have to worry . In that case you can use your phone for a translation. So go man go. and make this the year you get two out of three wishes come true. Oh anyway I forgot, if you play an instrument you are doing both at the same time. Music is a world wide language that you can share with any nationality. If you play an old folk tune you will no doubt find others who either sing along or join in with their instruments. Good luck and let me know which language you ended up with

        Reply
    • Staying Alive 18th January 2022 at 4:28 pm

      Too many of my wishes to choose from genie 🧞‍♂️ 😢

      Reply
    • Woodcrafter-Keith 18th January 2022 at 4:34 pm

      If I had three wishes
      Apart from the obvious standard miss World type answers I’m gonna go for

      1) A nice house in France with enough money to retire on
      2) A lovely lady to share it with
      3) A new body that’s less worn out than this one lol

      Reply
    • 1Christy 18th January 2022 at 7:17 pm

      Be careful

      Reply
    • Linpap 18th January 2022 at 8:11 pm

      🤣🤣🤣

      Reply
    • Ems 18th January 2022 at 8:31 pm

      I would wish for:

      1. No global pandemics.

      2. Friends and family to be happy and healthy.

      3. Early retirement for me!

      Reply
    • Mo001 18th January 2022 at 8:35 pm

      Tambos what would you wish for??? 🤔

      Reply
    • Pops McCarthy 19th January 2022 at 10:58 am

      Seriously, for once. Peace Love n Harmony

      Reply
    • Loriax 19th January 2022 at 9:24 pm

      Wads of cash, new knees and politicians that put the country and its people first.

      Reply
    • madeleine45 19th January 2022 at 11:48 pm

      as we all say the big wishes for peace and care of the planet are there but on a personal level

      1. not asking to avoid all illness but to be free of cancer and that my back would be pain free, as it is not just the pain but it stops me doing so many things and affects every day.
      2. To be in a marvellous church in Venice or in Vienna singing one of the 40 parts in a good performance of Spem in Alleum
      3.To have the magic ability of being able to be sat with my eyes shut in a newly mown hayfield, with the sun beating down and the birds singing ,just for 10 minutes whenever life gets too much.

      Reply
    • Alexandra 2013 20th January 2022 at 12:10 am

      Obviously the first would be no more killing just peace & contentment for all

      For me someone who understands me who likes the same things

      The last would be to win the lottery as I could help a lot of people be happy which would make me happy

      Reply
      • Tambos57 20th January 2022 at 7:52 pm

        Wish two👍

        Reply
        • Alexandra 2013 20th January 2022 at 8:43 pm

          Is it that hard really to find someone who thinks the same – but maybe it is, I don’t know. I’ve always liked someone who’s confident to take the lead. In my jobs I’ve been the boss but outside work (now retired) like someone who’s happy to take the lead and care. Old fashioned I know and maybe not PC but don’t really care. Also happy in my own company. Often go away in UK for long weekends. Long walks in quiet places, happy to sit by the sea in sun, wind and yes rain to watch the sea do it’s thing. But yes number one wish would always be my priority. Off to Peak District in April – Dubai in May (Curtesy of my son) Scotland end of August- just need somewhere to go in March 👏🏻👏🏻

          Reply
        • Tambos57 20th January 2022 at 8:59 pm

          I think a lot of us search for the our ‘holy grail’

          Some nice trips though, watch the midgies

          Lyn peninsula/Anglesey has some great beaches/walks/views and in March, certainly not busy.

          Reply
    • Alexandra 2013 21st January 2022 at 10:16 am

      I was on Angelsey in October 😃, just me wandering loved it. Many years ago I remember having a bevvy in Ty Coch the pub on the beach near Morfa Nefyn near Cricceth. I totally forgot about that till you mentioned The Llyn P. Think I’ll give that another visit soon. Thx for the reminder

      Reply
    • madeleine45 21st January 2022 at 10:29 am

      Oh alexandra what memories you have brought back. I had an uncle who was a vet in Morfa Nefyn where we used to go to visit. Years later I was married to a Griffith, whose aunt and uncle lived on anglesey , all welsh speaking , so that was another welsh memory time and then I spent many years sailing our old Westerly Centaur and sailed all over but including up on the welsh coasts and anglesey. We also used to walk and camped around Abergwesen and Cricceth. Happy days and thankyou for letting me travel back more than 60 years to Morfa this morning.

      Reply
    • Hal W 21st January 2022 at 9:05 pm

      1. Tidy the garage.
      2. Create a map showing where all the wish granting genies are at any time
      3. Equanimity.

      Reply
    • Magnolia19 22nd January 2022 at 7:52 am

      Only one to be able to talk to my dear Dad again who died in October Just to tell him how much I love him Never said it enough when he was alive 😢

      Reply
    • Dorothea 22nd January 2022 at 8:19 am

      1) that my Mam hadn’t died (2017)as I miss her very much;

      2) that people could be kinder, more supportive and more understanding towards others, so that the things which make us different are accepted and our difficulties and challenges are understood and supported. I’m thinking health wise, but it could apply in all sorts of ways.

      3) that I could have sailed easily through the menopause, which would make my life and those of everyone around me, so much nicer and happier. Sorry if this isn’t enough about world peace etc, but this last one would certainly have made local life more harmonious.

      Reply
    • madeleine45 22nd January 2022 at 8:43 am

      To Dorothea ,
      totally with you re the menopause . I recommend it being a time of bread making!! when you cant sleep , or feel annoyed that the rest of the world is asleep , just not you, or you have nearly blown a gasket hearing the latest news on Boorish Johnson, bread making is a great answer. The more you bash and knead it the better the loaf will rise and you end up with wonderful fresh home made bread. Try to wait for it to cool a little or you will get indigestion, but then add butter and ooh, what shall it be today of the choice of home made jam, strawberry, or blackcurrent? If you havent had time to make any yourself , watch out for WI markets to be back on or a farmers market. What is more miserable than a sliced white slice of cheap bread with matching miserable cheap jam , compared to the bliss of home made bread and jam, with quality jam and a decent fresh coffee. Bliss! So next time Boorish Johnson infuriates you you can “kneed” the dough with him in mind!

      Reply
    • Fuff 22nd January 2022 at 8:50 am

      That’s easy, I would wish that my son didnt have Crohn’s disease, my sons fiancée didn’t have MS the third wish wouldn’t matter – be nice to save it just in case I needed it .

      Reply
    • Northendean 22nd January 2022 at 9:21 am

      I wouldn’t ask for any stuff and I know it’s going to sound a bit deep, but I’d ask for the ability to ‘not take life too seriously’, to ‘see the humour in everything’, and to ‘have the energy of a 25 year old permanently’!☺️

      Reply
    • Andee 22nd January 2022 at 9:39 am

      It’s easy, my hair, hearing and eyesight as I hate getting old.

      Reply
    • SBraveheart 23rd January 2022 at 1:40 am

      Another three lamps

      Reply
    • Spiritual Guy 23rd January 2022 at 5:29 am

      Boris Johnson had had the worst heckling of his life in parliament so he was relieved to finally get back to his home.
      He found this dirty old lamp by his front door and on rubbing it clean a genie popped out and granted him 3 wishes.
      Not believing his luck he first wished that every member of the opposition defected to his party.
      “Granted,” said the genie, “as soon as you enter parliament tomorrow it will happen”.
      Excitingly he asked for his second wish that the queen knighted him.
      “Granted,” said the genie, “as soon as you enter parliament tomorrow the queen will send Black Rod to summon you for your knighthood”.
      Thinking he had better tidy his hair for the queen his final wish was for a comb.
      “Granted,” said the genie, “you’ll find one in your pocket as soon as you are about to enter parliament tomorrow.”
      Next day he boldly struts up to a full house in parliament.
      He puts his hand in his pocket but there’s no comb.
      “Never mind,” he thinks , “Her Majesty is used to my scruffy mop”.
      He enters parliament only to be met by the same boos as the day before.
      “That’s strange,” he thinks, but then hears the heavy knock on the door.
      “It’s Black Rod, let him in at once” says a now very excited Boris.
      Black Rod enters and shouts “Her Majesty the Queen has immediately declared this parliament be dissolved and a general election be called!”
      Boris’s face drops, he peers inside his jacket pocket where he has the lamp and hisses in a far from pleased tone , “Oi ! You promised me three wishes!”
      After a short pause a deep voice from inside the lamp replies :
      “You see? You’re not the only lying b*****d around here are you!”
      😂

      Reply
    • Always 23rd January 2022 at 8:14 am

      I asked my 4 year old granddaughter this question and her reply
      1. A real Unicorn
      2. A princess castle where we can all live together
      3. Loads of shoes and handbags and clothes (😂 that’s my girl!)

      Reply
    • NSilva 23rd January 2022 at 11:27 am

      My wishes will be:
      1 Health
      2 Achieve my employment goals
      3 To be able to foster

      The order is the necessary one to achieve the main one 🌞

      Reply
    • N125 24th January 2022 at 11:32 am

      Just saying…..

      Reply
    • SharronE 24th January 2022 at 12:55 pm

      To go back to when I was 8 years old.

      Reply
Add